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Indecisive Woman Incites Mild Hostility at Red Box©

eddie (Austin, TX) Local woman, Laquanda Brown, took 'too effing long' to choose a movie from a the Red Box in front of the 7-11 on East Riverside Drive, witnesses reported. Chase Williams, the manager of the 7-11 witnessed the entire debacle.  "I really thought she would make a quick decision at "The Box". She came into the store and right away picked up her Monster Energy drink, a Big Grab bag of Cheetos, a Mrs. Baird's© Fried Lemon Pie and some Camel Lights. No hesitation at all. Just boom, here's what I want!" pausing to ring up another customer he added "It just doesn't add up, you know?"
Brown, then made her way out the front door and began perusing a vast selection of the latest hits to reach DVD and Blu-Ray, seemingly in no hurry to make her selection.  She at first seemed curious about the story of Secretariat, the famed horse and Triple Crown winner and namesake of the Disney movie starring Diane Lane and Mos Def (in what many are calling hise finest horse related role.). The attention was short lived, however, when she came upon the Bruce Willis thriller RED.  Onlookers were hopeful that the combination of Willis, Morgan Freeman and John Malkovich as retired, but deadly CIA agents would be enough for French make her much anticipated decision... Not so.

very own Shaniqua Washington (Hair-dresser and fashion stylist to the stars) was also there to witness the event. "Bitch was, like, just standing there in her dirty-ass sweat pants eating them naxty Cheetos and not even renting no movie," Shaniqua stated. "Not to mention she was smearing her cheesy-ass fingers all over the touch screen while she kept on browsing. Damn, I was bout to strangle that bitch!"
Fortunately for the growing crowd of increasingly hostile renters behind Ms. French, fate intervened. After seeming to narrow her selections down to two or three movies, she was overheard muttering to herself, "Man this some bullshit right here." Apparently realizing she had forgotten her bank card, Brown casually walked off, leaving the seventeen or so, renters behind her with a "seriously rank Cheeto fart" and a lifetime of pondering what films she might have rented.
"Just seems like such a shame to spend all that time here and then not rent anything," Third-Person-In-Line, Jenny Cook said as the woman in front of her quickly chose the movie Avatar and went on with her life. "In the end it was just kind of sad, really."